Unforgettable, thats what You are

Grateful

Its been awhile since i last posted. All i can say is that during that time i was really seeking God and He was shaking things in my life and in me that needed to be shaken, the many misconceptions about Him that i had and how i saw myself as well. It wasn't easy. But i thank the Lord for keeping me, i know i can never blame Him for anything bad or tough that i go through in life, although during the process people do discourage me, but i take comfort in counting the cost and choosing the right response. Knowing God is not just about revelations, neither is it just about reading the word and praying, all those are good, but what i've learnt is that knowing God is about looking back at points in life that were tough and you could not pull through, and seeing how He saved the day and changed things around. That's the reality. That's how i know God is REAL. He just pulled me through and carried me. Deep emotions, hurts and things that i clinged on too as my indentity, all i can say now Lord, is THANK YOU. I want to build my identity in Him, because if i build it on anything else, one day, it will fade away. I am also grateful for Him putting great people in my life, beautiful people, ones that have built their foundations and identities in Him and Him alone. I look back and see how God has sent people too, in my dark hours, being me who would keep to myself, God sent people to speak and affirm me. Believing in God is Faith. Faith is believing without seeing, as much i cannot see God now, I saw glimpses of Him through the people that supported me along the way. My gratitude cannot be measured in earthly quantities. You oh Lord knew me and shaped me, You made me different in a way, sometimes You even say i am more different from others. I want to believe that now. I don't want to hate myself any longer. I am free in You Oh LORD!

I just want to take a special note of 16th July, which was yesterday, that day i experienced God in a real big and different way. Firstly to open up and share during the prayer at JYC, secondly a step to bless the younger ones as a ministry (not mine Lord, but yours). Thirdly for God telling me to come out and trust Him and how to know Him, that shook me greatly, i made the choice while walking to Kopitiam to fall back on Him and Him alone, even though i may walk what seems a lonely road. I CHOOSE to be happy because i am in You God! Thank you Lynn for that. And last but the most fulfilling part of the day, the time i spent at east coast. That was the most enjoyable part of the day, processing everything with God and sorting it out, i had a chance to just be free and be me during my dinner/supper. Sharing things of my past and myself, which i never really liked doing because i thought it was too much of self. But now i know that is not true, being true to yourself enables you to share about yourself without any bad feelings or thoughts that people might have a misconception. That's Freedom. So i thank you, Dear lovely friend, Jing'en, for it was a privilege to just spend that time with you. I thank God for the heart He has given you, how you chose to obey Him even though you didn't feel comfortable putting the day's message into action, also how it feels and concerns for others around you. I thank God for the sight and insight He has given you, for it has enable others, i'm sure, to see. God really made you special, for your ability to appriciate and understand many things, how diverse some may be. Yes, stars and surroundings He made for you, and those who take a little time to just look around. (:

Thank You Lord for friends. I never need to be afraid of losing any now, because even if i do, i know at least i have blessed them and vice versa. The best friend i can have is You Lord Jesus.

posted by Dan @ 10:15 AM